Tuesday 25 September 2012

Rites of Passage Organisations

Stepping Stones Project - Northern California

Global Passageways

Animas Valley Institute

Barrios Unidos

Boys to Men

Centre for the Advancement of Youth, Family & Community Services - rope.org

Golden Bridge

Labyrinth Centre

Men's Leadership Alliance

Mosaic Voices

Ojai Foundation

Pathways Foundation

Rite of Passage Journeys

Rites of Passage Institute

School for Lost Borders

Shadetree Foundation

The Wilderness Within

Wilderness Reflections

Wednesday 30 May 2012

Grief Ritual

I did a grief ritual with Sobonfu Some this weekend.

We arrived to a warm room with a big fire and drummers. She got everyone up on our feet and bopping, dancing, just by doing it herself and gesturing to us to join in. Then she got us to bop around the room and introduce ourselves to everyone while bopping.

She gave us a bit of an intro - saying this is one of the most challenging things we will ever do for ourselves, and one of the most rewarding.

Then we went round the circle introducing ourselves and 'what horse we rode in on.'

Then she gave a little talk about grief.

In Africa where she comes from, she said, when people visit they say, why are the people so happy? They have nothing? To which her people reply, 'we cry a lot!'

We have to take responsibility for our own emotions, she says; let our hearts rise to the occasion and feel. In our culture she says we're very good at putting our feelings onto others and less good at going through them ourselves. As a result there's a Lot of emotional debris flying around, clogging the air.

She told lots of jokes. She said the person at the end of the circle has to say everyone's name. It's a trick question. So the person at the end says, "everyone's name!"

After everyone said their name, the whole room said back, 'Welcome <Briony>". Really loud and warm. It was good.

Then we went to bed. It all happened after dinner.

...

The next morning, as far as I remember, more drumming and dancing. It lifts the spirits. They began to drum when it was time to assemble, to call us.

She gave us a talk about grief.

There are many different kinds of grief, she said.

"Personal grief" - she puts in inverted commas because in her culture, there is no such thing as personal grief. If it's a problem of purpose, it's a community problem. If it's a problem of relationship, it's a community problem. If it's a problem of suicide or of violence, it's a community problem. Individuals are simply channels through which issues affecting the whole community are manifesting.

Communal grief - is grief we feel because of grief that affects many people similarly. Classic examples are the Tsunami, Hurricane Katrina, Princess Di's death. But really this also includes all "personal griefs."

something like "nature grief" - grief for planetary suffering.

Ancestor grief - for the lines of unresolved difficulty that are passed to you from your parents, grand-parents, great grand parents and so on.

Primordial grief - for grief that arose in the womb, either directly or as an absorption of maternal grief.

Past life grief. ?

Simple grief - grief that can be unloaded in a single attempt.

Complex grief - grief with many layers and different elements to it. Eg divorce.


Then she talked about the grief process.

The healthy grief process, she said, goes through the following stages: shock, sadness, anger, rage / hysteria, catharsis, exhaustion, joy. (And a healed state).

The unhealthy / unsupported grief state goes something like, shock, numbness, indifference, denial, depression, possibly addiction, possibly suicide / homicide / self-mutilation, sadism.

If you find yourself suffering symptoms of an unsupported grief process, you need to go back and grieve it properly, and do heartening practices - re-sensitise your own heart and in the process allow what needs to come out of it to come. Accepting.

Then we got into groups of 4 and went outside for an hour. Each person had 15 minutes to tell of their grief to the others.

Then it was lunchtime.

In the afternoon we started to prepare the ritual alters. Three - one for the grief, one for the ancestors, one for forgiveness. Material, structures from chairs and pins, structures from wood and twigs bound together with twine, everyone helping a little bit, having little prayer circles before the work started.

When that was done we were instructed to: take the items we had brought (decomposable; won't be taken home) that represented our grief, and a little cloth and string. Go outside alone, no talking. Find other items to represent new layers of grief you have discovered. Include yet other items to represent grief that you don't know about yet. Go outside and find a spot. Invite the ancestors. Tell them you need their help. Name each of your items of grief in turn, and spit on them. Arrange them in your bundle. Come back.

The bundles go on the grief alter, in groups of 4. The groups who went outside. (Group 1! Group 2!). If anyone starts crying as they throw their bundles down everyone has to rush to put their bundles on because they become like radioactive with the whole group's grief energy.

But first there is an invocation to each of the elements - earth, fire, water, nature and mineral.

Then the bundles are placed on the grief alter behind the ash line. There's something about the ash line that I didn't understand. You Cannot go behind the line. You are Not Allowed.

Then the song starts. It's a simple three line wailing song, which resolves on the last note. It means, we cannot do this alone.

Two lines of mats are placed before the grief alter with boxes of tissues. Two gate-keepers guard the sides. It's their job to enlist support and replacements from the 'village' when they're needed.

The song starts. The 'village' starts singing and dancing. 'Sing, dance, grieve' were our instructions.

People start to walk up to the alter and sit or kneel. The alter elicits grief behaviour. As soon as someone goes, someone has to follow with their hand raised to show they're going to support. Every griever has a person behind them keeping their back. If any supporter or gate keeper needs replacing, they or the gate keeper raise a finger to ask the community for a replacement.

It's OK to pause the ritual for meals and sleep. IN Africa they just go for 72 hours and you find your own food and sleep if you need it. But that doesn't quite work in the US. To pause you stop the drumming and keep singing. Then gradually bring it to a close. Thank the ancestors, thank the spirits, ask them to come back. Two people must always stay in the space. Others must bring them food and come to replace them for, eg, morning showers and things.

When it was closed, two volunteers came to take the grief bundles. They were very well saged and prayed for by Sobonfu first. They lifted the fabric laid below the grief bundles, bundled it up, took it out and buried it. Then they had to go and shower, and change their clothes, adn wash their clothes in salty water.

Meanwhile we took down the alters and cleared up.

When they came back in we erupted in cheers, hugs, drumming, then they sat on chairs and everyone massaged them. "Torture!"

Meanwhile, Sobonfu asked if anyone had a good joke and we all made each other laugh.

One final tiny check in - tell me you're here,  you're in your body.

It was super super duper.

Charlie would have needed it. My parents need it. Graham Jo and Hannah need it. Michael probably needs it. Everyone probably needs it.

How do we get it to them?

Wednesday 7 March 2012

Let's Celebrate 365

Jeremy Hunter has spent 35 years documenting ancient rituals and festivals in 60 countries. His photographs can be seen in his touring exhibition Let's Celebrate 365.




"Sing-sings in Papua New Guinea form an important part of cultural life as they represent an opportunity for the clans to express their tribal solidarity. I saw the black snake dance performed by the Apenda clan when they attended a sing-sing in Leh, near Morobe."  The Guardian 

He also has an interesting looking book called Sacred Festivals.

See his website for more.


Monday 27 February 2012

Passover


thanks to John Pratt for the picture

The religious scholar Karen Armstrong on Start the Week today recounted a trip to Senegal in which she visited a slave house once used to store slaves before they were shipped to America and Europe. The building, she noted, was built in 1776, the same year that America's Declaration of Independence was signed.


"Very often freedom for some means slavery and suffering for others," Karen says, "and this is a conundrum of human history. This is what the Haggadah [the passover text], every year, makes one confront."


Passover recounts and re-enacts the time that Jews fled enslavement in Egypt, and brings to mind the experience of all oppressed people and peoples, according to Jonathan Saffran Foer who was also on the panel. Passover highlights in our hearts oppression as a thing to oppose, to avoid participating in, and to try to prevent.

We realise, perhaps, looking then at the clothes we wear and the technologies we use and the inequalities in the countries we inhabit that to avoid participating in oppressive systems is difficult. 


Which may be one of many reasons why we need these weekly spaces to reflect on and explore meaning, values, and how we are to live as ourselves, with each other, in the world.

Yom Kippur and Rosh Hashanah




I asked my partner Michael about the period of retreat and reflection that Jewish people embark on at the time of Jewish new year. He replied thus:


"It is a ten day period between Rosh Hashanah and Yom kippur. I don't know if it has a name. It is a very powerful and relevant time. Probably one of the most heart searching, tear jerking, fruitful, and fun opportunities to go into the depths that Judaism has to offer. I recommend it very much. Rosh Hashanah is a joyful, family-oriented celebration to share thanks for all the great experiences and people that have allowed us to grow, shed our old skins, continually arrive in new places and new depths, make new discoveries about the world and ourselves, work so hard for the world, and our great contributions however big or simple they may have been.


"Also we celebrate the blessedness of the coming year with all its suprises, all its discoveries, all its tears, connections and laughter, all its disconnections, deaths and births both of people and internal places, old selves that we are ready to let go of and new ones that are being born.


"Then comes that great time in between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kipur where we go into the underworld, alone, and look at all the stuff! All the nooks and crannies where stuff got hidden, all the things we brushed under the carpet and hoped no one saw (including ourselves). "Maybe I'll just forget about it." Well guess what, it's all still there and now is the time to look at it. Oh, what a blessed time it is. On bended knee we go in front of God and face all of our lives, our shortcomings, our longcomings... And we face it all with tears in our eyes.


"Then comes Yom Kippur. Oh what a special time! We come together and face all of these hard places together. Not only do we bring all the difficult discoveries we made to the group to share, we also take on a collective burden to the world. "OUT LOUD WE CRY." We take full responsibility for all the horrendous pain and suffering that goes on in the world, all the oppression, all the pollution, all the violence, all the greed. We take it all on "as God is our witness." This is the only day where we do this; on no other day is it useful to take this much responsibility, but we do it so that we can truly come out of Yom Kippur ready and energized to play our part in the healing of the world (Tikun Olam), healing the brokeness of the world, taking part in what Joanna Macy calls 'The Great Turning'."

Monday 23 January 2012

Alain de Botton's "Athiesm 2.0"



"You know the kind of thing I'm talking about - people who are attracted to the ritualistic side, the moralistic, communal side of religion, but can't bear the doctrine.

"Until now these people have faced rather an unpleasant choice. It's almost as if either you accept the doctrine - and then you can have all the nice stuff, or you reject the doctrine and you're living in a sort of spiritual wasteland under the guidance of CNN and Walmart.

"So, that's a sort of tough choice. I don't think we have to make that choice. I think there is an alternative. I think there are ways - and I'm being both respectful and completely impious - of stealing from religion. If you don't believe in a religion there's nothing wrong with picking and mixing - with taking out the best sides of religion."

"We have secularised badly, I would argue."


In the late 19th century church attendance dropped, Alain reports. People panicked: how are people going to find guidance, morality, and consolation? Influential voices pointed to culture: replacing scripture with culture.

"It's an idea that we have forgotten. If you went to a top university - let's say you went to Harvard, or Oxford or Cambridge - and you said, I've come here because I'm in search of morality, guidance and consolation - I want to know how to live! They would show you the way to the insane asylum. This is simply not what our grandest and best institutes of higher learning are in the business of. Why? They don't think we need it. They don't think we are in urgent need of assistance. They see us as rational adults: what we need is information, we need data, we don't need help.

"Now, religions start from a very different place indeed. All major religions at various points call us 'children.' And, like children, they believe that we are in severe need of assistance - we're only just holding it together - perhaps it's just me, maybe you - and we need help! Of course we need help! We need guidance and we need didactic learning."

"Religions are cultures of repetition. They circle the great truths again and again and again."

"The other things that religions do is to arrange time. All the major religions give us calendars. What is a calendar? A calendar is a way of making sure that across the year you will bump into very important ideas." (E.g. Catholocism and generosity)

"Religions set up rituals around important feelings." (E.g. buddhism and the moon)

"The other thing religions know is that we are not just brains, we are also bodies and when they teach us a lesson, they do it via the body." (eg Jewish forgiveness and mikvah)

"The people in the modern world, the secular world, who are interested in matters of the spirit, in matters of the mind, the higher, soul-like concerns, tend to be isolated individuals. They're poets, they're philosophers, they're photographers they're film makers, and they tend to be on their own. They are cottage industries. They are vulnerable single people. And they get depressed, they get sad on their own. And they don't really change much. What do organised religions do? They group together, they form institutions. That has all sorts of advantages.

"First of all scale. The Catholic church pulled in $97bn last year according to the Wall St Journal."

"They're collaborative, they're branded, they're multinational, and they're highly disciplined. These are all very good qualities, we recognise them in relation to Corporations - and corporations are very like religions in many ways, except they're right down at the bottom of the pyramid of needs, they're selling us shoes and cars - and the people who are selling us the higher stuff - the poets, the therapists - are on their own and they have no power, they have no might.

"Books written by lone individuals are not going to change anything. We have to group together."

Saturday 21 January 2012

A.J. Jacobs' year of living biblically



Author, philosopher, prankster and journalist A.J. Jacobs talks about the year he spent living biblically -- following the rules in the Bible as literally as possible.

"The third lesson I learnt was that thou shalt have reverence. This one was unexpected because I started the year as an agnostic, and by the end of the year I became what a friend of mine called a 'reverent agnostic' - which I love. (I'm trying to start it as a movement so if anyone wants to join...) The basic idea is that whether or not there's a God, there's something important and beautiful about the idea of sacredness. Our rituals can be sacred, the sabbath can be sacred..."

"Another lesson is that thou shalt give thanks. This one was a big lesson because I was praying, giving these prayers of thanksgiving - which was odd for an agnostic - but I was saying thanks all the time everyday. And I started to change my perspective, and I started to realise the hundreds of little things that go right every day that I didn't even notice, I took for granted, as opposed to focusing on the three or four that went wrong. So this is actually a key to happiness for me."

Friday 13 January 2012

Schizophrenia and Shamanism

I went to the British Library to read this article and it was so interesting I ended up noting the whole thing down. I have (perhaps a little cheekily) copied it up here. I haven't included references.

Schizophrenia and the origins of shamanism among the Kawtikuti Martitime cultures of northwest North America: A hypothesis
Rif S. El-Mallakch, mood disorders research programme, department of psychiatry and behavioural sciences, University of Louiseville School of Medicine.


Dear Editors

19th Century anthropological field workers investigating Siberian natives were the first to introduce the idea that the shamans of this culture were 'psychopathic' individuals, whose psychopathology contributed to their success as shamans (refs). Subsequent investigations by psychologists and psychiatrists were limited, inconclusive or negative (refs).

The concept of shamanism has been poorly defined. The term "shaman" represents a wide range of medical, religious and political healers, practitioners and leaders in various cultures world-wide (refs). Consequently the term takes its meaning only when placed in the context of both time and place.

This paper will focus on shamans in the late 19th and early 20th century maritime cultures of North West North America. These cultures were relatively intact when anthropologic workers documented their cultures in the 1800s and 1900s. The shamens of this area served primarily as communicators with the spirits. Because of their unique and valuable ability, they could, at times, heal, foretell future events, and advise in individual and community decisions (refs).

In this culture, there were two general types or levels of shaman: the family and the professional shaman (refs). The family shaman was usually a family member with several relatives and, perhaps, an extended small community. Professional shaman usually lived in larger communities and served all. It is generally believed that professional shamanism evolved from the tradition of family shaman (refs), but the origins of family shamanism are much more obscure.

1. Pacific North West Maritime Cultures
Family shamans were men or women who were indistinguishable from their peers during their early development. Would-be shamans often became evident in late adolescence and early adulthood (Refs). They would endure a period of severe psychological distress that would lead the would-be shaman to seek solitude. In the depths of their distress they would either hear or see (or both) a spirit. This experience was often their salvation. From that point on, the shaman would have special contact with 'their' spirit. Some shamans, especially those connected with very powerful spirits, would be able to communicate with more than one spirit (refs).

Because of their special relationship with their spirit, these individuals would serve as family shamans whose essential service was communication with the spirits. They were sought when a spirit with whom they could communicate was felt to be involved in an event or process (refs). Family shamans were neither primary healers nor priests.

Family shamans never charged directly for their services. However they were generally 'cared for' by their family or community. This was essential since most family shamans were inept at performing the tasks needed for survival (ref).

Professional shamans probably evolved from the family shaman tradition (refs). They served larger communities and generally received some compensation for their activities. Although a mystical experience was still a necessary start to their shamanic career, there are few other similarities to family shamans. Apprenticeship among the professional shaman was a common practice. Frequently individuals with epileptic seizures were purposely recruited (refs). There is considerable evidence that professional shamans deliberately deceived or fabricated their supernatural feats (refs).

Professional shamans generally gained more status and wielded considerably more power than the family shamans. It is thus not surprising that anthropologic field workers generally sought and studied the professional shamans (refs).

2. Synthesis
An examination of the patterns of life histories of family shaman and modern schizophrenics reveals striking similarities. The prevalence of shamans in small communities is similar to most estimates of the prevalence of schizophrenia - roughly one per 100 - 150 individuals. The boringly unremarkable childhood and dramatically tumultuous early adulthood are striking. The requisite mystical (psychotic?) experience in the setting of severe psychological distress is very reminiscent of the schizophrenic's first psychotic break. Unlike the modern schizophrenic, the would-be family shaman finds that he / she is frequently sought out and respected by others. Despite the dramatically different cultural response, the family shaman and modern schizophrenic go on to lead somewhat similar lives. Both choose to isolate themselves and keep interactions with others to a minimum, psychotic or mystical experiences continue to occur throughout most of their lives. An apparent lack of initiative, and inability to blend into the mainstream of life and its demands, makes both shaman and schizophrenic incapable of performing the functions of everyday life. Members of the respective communities must care for these individuals (refs).

3. Summary
The dramatic failure of schizophrenics to assimilate into modern western style culture creates a subtle prejudice against the illness. Consequently, there is a visceral response when the word is used. This makes objective  comparisons regarding other cultures difficult, especially when there is a heightened acceptance of cultural differences. Nonetheless, the observation that shaman of some cultures suffer from some forms of psychopathology, even when viewed in the context of their own cultures, has been made repeatedly. Unfortunately, a series of historical circumstances prevented objective examination of this hypothesis. In the late 19th and early 20th century North West North American Maritime cultures there existed two types of shamans, a fact not appreciated in previous investigations of this question (refs). It appears that one type of shaman - the family shaman - has sufficient similarities with modern schizophrenics to support the hypothesis that psychopathology may have been a force in the origin of shamanism in that culture.